Waiting Game

I have an appointment with my chemo oncologist next week on Wednesday. My husband will come with me to that.

I have an appointment with my radiation oncologist next Thursday. My older sis is coming with me to that.

I asked the lady who set my appointment with the chemo doc—how long til I start actually doing this stuff? She said about 2 weeks after these appointments.

So til then, I’m bouncing between feeling normal sometimes, then being scared, then just wishing I could start already, then happy I’m just chilling around my house like the old days. And the cycle repeats in no particular order.

People have told me I’ll feel better once I get the damn ball rolling. I know that is going to be true.

I still can’t believe it. Sometimes I really get pissed. I can’t get over how healthy I’ve tried to be all my life and for what. I have to go through this.

But I guess going and getting myself checked out was a healthy thing too. Glad I didn’t wait any longer. But still wish I had gone sooner.

Oh well.

So I’ll wait. And hopefully not loose my marbles before I hop to it.